I want to be a Yesman

Something happens when you realize you're not as young as you used to be. When 25 strikes, you're like dude! I'm old enough to be a mother of about 10 in some cultures, responsible for a company, a household, a life - or ten - what happens if I fail.

When you're in the last year of your 20s... that is 29, and you're still single, don't have a car, a home to call your own, a job you're not quite sure you'll have tomorrow, things really fall into perspective.

You see, just the other day, you were 10 wishing you could turn 18 and leave home. Then you were 18 and had to be responsible for yourself. And now you're almost 30, and wish you could be a kid again, but with all the knowledge you have now, and maybe twice the amount of money.

But it's never that way, is it?

What happens when you accept your age is, you just stop to care so much because, damn! life goes by so fast, before we know what's going on, we're 50 and hoping we'll make 70 without a hip injury, or Alzheimer's. We hope we won't be alone or lonely for the rest of our life (I guess we all do). We hope we'll love our children when we finally have them. Then we begin to wish we'd see our grandchildren, you know, have a sort of surety that our 'awesomeness' won't die with us, that it will continue, for at least a few centuries if not forever.

Religion and God

Another thing that gets awakened, at least for me it did, is the grand awareness of A BEING, A MIGHTY MARVELLOUS ALL POWERFUL BEING THAT CAN DO ANYTHING FOR YOU IF YOU ASK, BUT ONLY IF IT'S GOOD FOR YOU. YOU KNOW?

But see, you haven't been to church in about a decade, or maybe two dozen years and wonder whether, it's not hypocritical to be going back just because you're afraid, hoping to get on good terms with the 'Man' upstairs before you kick the bucket.

You're practically middle-aged because the life expectancy is 55, so you feel like... the end is nigh.

And sure, you feel that you're not afraid of death but, you also feel that perhaps things are not as they should be 'this close to the end,' see?

And church is out of the question, right? So, how about we ask the Mighty Maker a question?

"If you exist, shew yourself."

A random string of awesomeness follows you around after that, only, it's not that random is it?

You realize that you've spent all your life saying No to the right things and Yes to the wrong things. What now?

Unable to get any deeper than that, you decide that you will reverse that yes-no situation, and become the right kind of Yesman! No?