Wednesday night came and i had what I think was a blast. I performed at Rezoras. Two songs. I thought I played the guitar very plainly. The first song was "Matuko Mothe" (my own composition; it means "All the days of my life" and the other one was "Collide", you know, by Howie Day. That's the one that people cheered for. Nobody seemed to like my song.
Any way,before I performed, i went to the Bathroom to check out my face and piss away my anxiety and i noticed that my whole face was one big mountain of bumps.The next day, i discovered that the rest of my body was bumpity bump land. I think its those clothes I bought from Grace, evil woman.Okay, okay, I know its not her fault.I should have washed those clothes before wearing them....but it was an emergencey!!!!REALLY!
You see the evening before, The Editor from the The Nation calls and asks if i can come for an interview. I say yes and agree to be there by 12:30, I have a make up exam that same morning @ 11:00am, the lecturer doesn't show up so I arrange to take the CAT later in the afternoon....after which i have to go change my clothes again, go meet Eric at the Studio and then change my clothes to suit him....AGAIN! So I'm in a Mat to Mada when guess who calls. Eric calls and says that I shouldn't go to Mada coz the "guys" are all in Tao ati at Pasara's.
Now at that very moment I'm thinking to myself, what the f*&#k should I do to show this guy that if he makes an arrangement, he should stick to it or else notify me when he makes changes. Plus, I don't have money to waste zooming up and down town. There are better uses I could put my money to.
But, I remained calm...actually no, i was so f*&cking pissed but i managed to go to the studio, change my clothes and head back for town.
Earth hath no stupidity like that of a man who can't stick to plans, he himself made. Eric says that he's at Pasaras with akina Deno and Steve and whoever else. I get there ..... he says he's on K-street.BUT HE SAID HE WAS AT PASARAS!!!!
If I had been alone, it might have been alright you see i could have just turned on my heels and headed back for home(I couldn't have afforded to set my foot in Pasara's; you pay like 1,000 just to look in) but no. William, my keyboardist was with me and had planned to be out of Rezoras by 9:00. It is now 8:00 and we are still waiting for Eric outside Pasara's nowhere near Rezoras or Westlands for that matter.
I call the guy a million times and he says that I'm becoming rude! Rude? Rude?....Rude is when you tell someone to meet you at 6pm and show up at 10pm unpeturbed. Rude is when you say you're in Pasaras when you are actually on K-street and ask me to wait for you outside Pasaras. for 2 f*%#ing hours.
Anyway, I decided to call my brother Gungun so he could take Will and me to Rezoras. He picks us up and we drive to Westlands in his white rental. My uncle from America who's paid for the car and whom I haven't see for about 15 years, I'm now 22, Kindly offers to buy us supper before we go to Rezoras. I eat a whole pizza alone, Will naively went for the chicken and fries.
Unlce gives me 1,000Kshs and I think to myself "Wow, now i can actually look into Pasara's". Then he lets me keep the change after he bought Will and me supper. Wow, he reminds me so much of my other brother, he's ever giving.
So anyway, we get to Rezoras and the music is too bloody loud. The singers are horrendous, but the guy on the drums is kinda cute and he plays like a rock star. The guitarist is one of our omore famous actors from Better Days ( what a hunk) and he too plays like a rock star. He and the Bass Guitarist( Another shy hunk) have this wierd connection that only they can understand. They keep looking at each other and play mad tunes.Wow! I think I still have a crush on the Guitarist...maybe it's just because he's famous....Naaaah! I ain't that shallow.
My turn to play comes so Will and me go to the the stage....surprisingly...I'm not nervous or scared...but I'm not happy either so when I sing, you can tell that I'm not feeling the music...especially on my first song. But when I sing "Collide" the crowd goes wild and everybody is cheearing. Deno is taking a video of me perfoming and when I look at him, I blush for the camera...or maybe it was for him....you know...i think that was a very good performance in terms of..."i had no fear" but terrible because the crowd didn't feel me entirely. I bored them in the beginning.
Steve was happy, Eric pretended to be happy, Shaffie was there with his wife...Shinde was there, Sheila Mwanyigah was there, Who knows who else was there. Obviously I didn't do very well because no one has called me since then not even Eric. I plan to go see him tomorrow. Or at least go to the studio and find out what's cooking.
V bugs me alot. I don't believe he's good enough for me. I'm polite and tell my self to give him a chance, but then I do and I'm totally disappointed. So I think it best to just rule him out Mapema. I know he likes me, he does. Unfortunately, I don't like him the same way. I think...he's a very good writer but I also think that he's unconciously trying to destroy and derail me. That's the end of that chapter. I'm done with him. Now, how to tell him!
Okay, I'm all burnt out. Think I'll rest now.
&Bondage&
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